


Acceptance

by flootzavut



Series: Five Stages [5]
Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: Alternate Timeline, Five Stages of Grief, M/M, Mild Fluff, References to sexual activity, Resolution, queer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-26
Updated: 2019-03-26
Packaged: 2019-12-18 07:29:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18245210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flootzavut/pseuds/flootzavut
Summary: Somewhere along the line, something changes.





	Acceptance

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pr0serpina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pr0serpina/gifts), [onekisstotakewithme](https://archiveofourown.org/users/onekisstotakewithme/gifts).



* * *

_**Acceptance** _

* * *

 

Somewhere along the line, something changes. One day John walks into the Swamp and finds Hawkeye winding yarn on BJ's hands, and he ruffles BJ's hair affectionately then leans down and kisses Hawk's temple. "Love you."

He doesn't even realise he's said it till he's stretched out on his bunk, and then he glances over because he can't help it, despite the fear churning in his belly.

BJ is grinning, _smirking_ , and if John weren't feeling so damn vulnerable right this moment, he'd go kiss that smug look off of BJ's face. (Once upon a time, his favoured option would've been to sucker punch BJ and knock him on his ass, but apparently Captain John Xavier McIntyre, MD, is finally growing up.)

He desperately wants to see Hawkeye's reaction and is also terrified. God, he hasn't felt this shy in decades. He forces himself to look.

Hawkeye is... his eyes are sparkling and he's smiling so hard his face is fuckin' _glowing_ , and they both just stare.

"Go on," BJ says softly. Out of the corner of his eye, John sees BJ letting the yarn slip down to his wrists and taking the ball from Hawk's unprotesting fingers. "For heaven's sake, Hawk, don't just sit there looking at the man."

(Okay. All right. At least in this moment, John sincerely and without reservation loves BJ Hunnicutt, too.)

Hawkeye has no shame (maybe it's just as well John has enough for all three of them put together); he crosses the tent, climbs on top of John, and kisses him, open-mouthed and hot, though even as they kiss, John can tell he's smiling too.

"God," he murmurs against John's lips, "I love you, I love you, too," and it's not the first time he's said it, he's said it or tried to say it to John so many times, but the weight of it is finally real. John's always known it was true, even if he tried not to think about it for a really long while, but this is different somehow.

(Maybe it's just that it's the first time Hawk's gotten to say 'I love you _too_ '.)

John's so occupied with his hands full of Hawkeye that he wouldn't know if the world ended, but then Hawk's pulling back and calling out to BJ, who John didn't even realise was creeping out the tent.

"Beej, come here a second."

BJ gives them a guilty look, wide eyed, as if he meant to be more stealthy. It's kind of sweet. "Uh, I was just gonna-"

"Just come over here, will ya?" John adds. He has no idea what Hawk has in mind, but he's sure BJ's hesitation is about him, not Hawkeye.

It does the trick. BJ approaches cautiously, like he's not certain if he's intruding. (John isn't sure himself if BJ's intruding or not. Once upon a time, BJ was absolutely an unwelcome outsider, but now he's so much a part of their slightly dysfunctional little knot, it might even be callous to exclude him from John's breakthrough.)

Hawkeye obviously doesn't have any doubt whether BJ belongs. He grabs BJ's hand and pulls till he's perched on the edge of the cot. BJ laughs, though he seems a bit shy. Hawkeye wraps his other hand around the back of BJ's neck, tugs him close and kisses him as well, and at last, John feels something other than the burn of envy and shame to see them together.

BJ's smiling when they surface, though he looks away and fidgets. "I should..." He gestures vaguely.

Hawkeye doesn't let go of his hand, linking their fingers together instead. "You should come down here and let me kiss you again."

"I think I owe you a kiss too," John adds. "What's your hurry, Hunnicutt?" Okay, so he was fooling himself before. He doesn't want BJ to leave.

BJ goes pink. "I feel like I should leave you guys alone to, uh..." He goes even pinker.

"To what?" John asks, with his best shit-eating grin and fake-innocent tone.

BJ's blush deepens and spreads. For a guy who can fuck like a fallen angel, he sure is easy to embarrass. It's cute. "Um. I'll just... go."

"No," Hawkeye says decidedly, "stay." He lifts BJ's hand up and drops a kiss on his knuckles. "Please?"

"But-"

"Stay." It's softer this time, warm and persuasive. John makes the executive decision to shuffle over and make room in the cot, taking Hawkeye with him till there's a gap almost big enough for an oversized lug like Hunnicutt. BJ might like to think he's still figuring out his options; John knows that tone of voice and knows it turns BJ Hunnicutt into Beej, that it wraps said Beej around Hawkeye's little finger, and that they definitely have company tonight.

"Hawk, you're a terrible person," BJ says as he gives up and allows himself to be coaxed into bed.

"I know," Hawkeye says, grinning, weedling his way tighter in between them like a needy cat. "Cuddle me."

John looks at BJ, who's looking down with exasperated adoration (something he wears most of the time around Hawkeye), and laughs. Then BJ looks up at him, and the expression changes to one of approval and- and a soft smile that's familiar but he never aimed at John before. It's like the sun coming out, and has John's heart going hoppity-skip in his chest as if he's a teenaged girl.

They hold the eye contact for a beat longer than John can find an excuse for. He looks away, cheeks flaming, then his eyes flutter closed involuntarily as BJ touches his jaw with those gentle, kind fingers and Hawk kisses the base of his throat.

Being the focus of their combined tenderness is startling in its rightness. There's an awful lot John has yet to figure out, but he's not pretending anymore. He knows who he is now. He can trust the rest will come.

_~ fin ~_

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently I can't resist cheese ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 😹
> 
> There may at some point be one last story as a little coda to the series, but it's taking me 5ever even to draft it, so for now, consider this essentially finished.
> 
> Thanks for all the support, and especially to the Piercintyre folks for being lovely to a transient in this part of the MASH sandbox.


End file.
